Saturday, November 21, 2009

Suspended in Mid Air

It goes something like this. The life you have doesn’t feel like it belongs to you. How did you get here? Maybe you will wake up and find out that nothing you saw, felt or heard was real. But this isn’t dream. It’s a disconnect, a state of suspension from whatever reality you have created.

There are times in our lives where this feeling is most intense. Times of radical transformation. Literature talks of change and transition while what I have experienced every 14 or 15 years were revolutions. A new world order slipping in while I was busy holding on to the old.

To the outsider looking in, there doesn’t seem to be much of a change. Same house, same relationships, same profession, same body. But inside I go into a state of deconstruction. Nothing fits, there are false notes everywhere. The dissonance becomes so great that transformation becomes inevitable. One drop makes your whole life overflow and …. You become more. You come into your own. When you announce it to the world, some are surprised, most or not. Something was oozing out of your pores all along.

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